New Approach for a New Year

Counseling

You win some, you lose some.

There’s an old Prudential insurance commercial, shown below, that I think about this time of year. It shows people's propensity to under-plan for the likelihood of negative outcomes. It’s like the equivalent of rose-colored glasses but for future events.

The reality is both victory and defeat await us in 2023. The societal pressures of toxic positivity and “good vibes only” can lead us to be woefully underprepared for life’s challenging events. We will not come out ahead every single day of every single week. Normal life is a mixed bag, and this year will be no different.

So…what do we do?

Maybe we should take a slightly different approach to New Year’s resolutions. Let’s strike a new balance in our planning and goal setting – plan for both the good and the bad.

Here is what I’m suggesting:

  • Along with setting goals for achievement, let’s also have goals that build up your resiliency. 

  • Let’s set goals for things we want to change about how we handle negative circumstances.

  • Maybe you want to grow in your capacity to sustain “normal life” stressors, such as positive change. 

  • Would you like to decrease your level of irritability with the people in your home?

  • Perhaps you’d like to change your monthly savings contribution to prepare for more small “emergencies” that will occur?

  • How about learning some new conflict resolution skills? 

  • Define what “down time” looks like for you between conflict and crisis.

  • How can you replenish your reserves between battles or projects?

We know that there *will be* positive and negative experiences that await us in 2023. You won’t meet all of your goals. There will be new babies to celebrate. You will lose people you care about. Second marriages will leave you feeling both excited and confused. Your refrigerator may go out. Your friend will let you down. Flat tires are a thing. 

Life and death.

Laughter and tears. 

2023 will hold it all.

Jesus tells us that the sun shines and the rain falls on the wicked and the good (Matthew 5:45). “Good” and “bad” things will happen to “good” and “bad” people.

Make sure your 2023 New Year’s resolutions reflect the full breadth of what your future will hold.

Spring Life Counseling LLC

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Most Frequently Given Counseling Advice: Work Backwards